Off Chasing Rainbows

Time to hit the road again in search of another woolly mammoth. Don the corporate uniform, grab a bite to eat, review some notes and check in at the security desk.

"Beautiful day here in (fill in the blank). Is it always this nice?"

"Yes, I do have an appointment. It's with Mr. Splatsitsberger at 1:30. I believe he said to call Jane's extension and she'd bring us to the board room."

"You don't have a Mr. Splatsitsberger? Okay, but do you have a woman named Jane?"

"No? Well, you wouldn't happen to know the name of the CEO would you? It wouldn't take us very long to show him what we've got."

"Him is a her? Hmmn, I probably should've known that. You wouldn't happen to validate parking would you?"

Ante Up!

Julie went to Poker Camp this weekend to be with the girls. It's a little odd to watch her get ready for the annual event because she doesn't even know how to play poker. The week before she starts asking me if I still have Hoyle Card Games on the computer. I don't answer because she doesn't know how to use the computer either.

Last year she missed camp so we got a few reminders before this year's event. That got me to thinking, why in the hell-blazes is everyone so anxious to have Julie go to Poker Camp? I mean we got phone calls, emails, letters, and smoke signals all with the message "make sure Julie shows up at Poker Camp this year!"

Maybe they want her to post because they need a good cook for the weekend. I mean Gus and Woodrow from Lonesome Dove didn't head north without Bolivar and the chuckwagon. It's hard to strategize on an empty stomach, and Lord knows Julie will never leave you hungry.

Some of the girls might think of her as an easy mark (or a fish) and....they would be right. When Julie picks up her hand in a card game the first thing she looks at is the artwork on the face cards. But would they sink so low as to invite her just to take 400 quarters? I suggested she bring a $100 bill and drop it on the table when she got to Vermont. Why lug around 20 pounds of coins you're never going to bring back?

Then there is the angle of the Poker Camp gift which is only something women could make up. Guys bring stuff to poker camp or the hunting lodge, but it's usually booze and they tend to hide it once they arrive. At the girls' camp, tradition dictates that in addition to cash you have to bring a grab bag gift that everyone has a chance of winning. I think the rules are similar to a Chinese Christmas where the person drawing last always wins the best prize. As you'd expect, Julie doesn't purchase a token gift but rather creates an elaborate artistic heirloom. As she's walking out the door I am always tempted to say, "We should probably apply for a patent before you give that away."

I also saw a few of the photographs from the 2004 weekend. I don't want to start any rumors, but there was one of two women laying on top of each other. Julie's a pretty good looking woman, but that would be a real kick in the balls to my marriage!

Well you know, chances are they just enjoy being around her like the rest of us. She's funny, witty, loving, and caring. You always learn a thing or two being with her. Hope you had a great time, Juls.

P.S. She is an easy mark!

Won't Anyone Stay Awake with Me?

I saw a father and son in church today. Not the scene you'd imagine of a young dad and a little boy, but rather a man my age with his elderly father. The father was badly bent and had to lean on his son to rise during the Mass. Despite his condition he stood and knelt with the rest of the congregation. I was touched to tears watching the son take care of his father.

The father obviously had a need and desire to be at the Mass. I don't know if the son shared the same level of spirituality for God, but he respected and loved his dad enough to bring him to God.

It reminded me of another man we used to see at the Cathedral. When my boys were younger we would go to Mass and sit front and left of center every Sunday. An elderly gentleman would be at the same Mass and he'd sit in isolation to the right of us. He always picked an empty pew. He never made eye contact with anyone and stood silent and still when it was time to exchange the sign of peace.

One Sunday, John and James decided to step out of their seat and confront him with the sign of peace. It was an awkward moment for sure, but he did exchange a friendly handshake. As the weeks went past he came to expect the greeting and he'd even smile at us as he came into church. He still wanted his own pew, but you could tell he really looked forward to the moment of friendship.

I don't know who he was. We never exchanged names. He used to come in on the senior citizen bus, so my guess is he lived alone or in the nursing home. A couple of years later he was gone.

I think about him now and again when I am in church. Once in awhile I'll even look for him. The man with his son reminded me of him today. John and James weren't the equivalent of a real son, but for a moment each Sunday they came close.

"Dear God, I pray in my old age I'll have a son to bring me to your altar as my journey on earth draws to an end. Please take care of all those who are lonely or broken hearted."

Robert Mullen - Employee of The Quarter

PORTSMOUTH, NH - January 26, 2006 - Bottomline Technologies (NASDAQ: EPAY), a leading provider of invoice automation and payments software and services, today announced that Robert Kevin Mullen has been awarded the prestigiousus Employee of The Quarter Award for his continued excellence and outstanding contribution to the rapid growth of their Legal Invoice Exchange business.

In presenting the award, Tom Gaillard, Vice President and General Manager, stated that Mr. Mullen has been the key individual responsible for the success of the venture. He stated that Mullen's leadership in customer relationships with global corporations such as AIG, Liberty Mutual Insurance, SafeCo Insurance, American Family, Commerce Insurance, and McKesson Corporation among others was the deciding factor in these companies choosing to do business with Bottomline.

In addition, his leadership as as Vice President of the Global LEDES Oversight Committee and Chairman of the International Standards Feedback Subcommittee clearly acknowledges his unique domain expertise in the market. He went on to cite Mullen's commitment to the business and to the every customer with a positive "can do" approach.

Gaillard also made note that Mullen may be the first person he has ever heard of who received a standing ovation following a customer demonstration at American Family Insurance, one of the largest insurers in the industry.

Congratulations Robert!

You make all of us at Bottomline proud. I know I speak for the rest of the family when I say you make all of the extended Mullen family so very proud.

Joe Mullen
Chief Executive Officer
Bottomline Technologies, Inc.

Love,

Your Brother

My Brother is a Moron

Last night I was telling my brother about the March for Life rally held in Washington D.C. on Monday. I told him of the interesting (startling) statistics on abortion and how I was awestruck at the courage of the women who spoke publicly about their personal experiences. It's hard to get up in front of strangers and bare your soul knowing there is a good chance of being ridiculed.

Now this isn't a blog about abortion, but rather one about who is or should be an inspiration for us in this life. Being a regular sinner (and irregular confessee) I tend to draw my inspiration from others who have fallen only to somehow find the light. Notice I didn't try to find a watered down synonym for sinner to describe myself. I know God watches all blogs, so there is no sense in compounding any problems I currently have with Him. In fact, let's change sinner to evildoer.

(NOTE TO SELF: Get back on point!)

I love the stories of transformation because they open up a tiny window to see God through the healing and compassion of another human being. The account of Saul shedding his hatred to become Paul, or Mary Magdalene reclaiming her dignity through Jesus are wondrous examples of how the most destitute of us can seek redemption and alas happiness.

Big brother has a different take on this. He thinks (so he says) that we've got the inspiration and example stuff backwards. Instead of elevating someone who has failed and made a comeback, he thinks we should find someone who hasn't fallen at all and ask them how they did it. Creative thinking on his part for sure and solid logic, but .....I don't like it!

Who wants to listen to some guy who has been married 30 years to the same woman, said his prayers, volunteered his time, donated his goods, been a loving dad, put in an honest days work every single day, paid the bills on time, kept the Ten Commandments blah, blah, blah! I'm supposed to feel good listening to him check off the "I've been a good boy this year, Santa" list while I take inventory of how many times I've committed adultery since the alarm went off this morning?

(NOTE TO OTHERS: Anyone recognize the guy in the previous paragraph?)

I can't do it. I need to hear how Francis of Assisi was a wealthy playboy mired in the depths of depravity before his transition to wisdom. I am moved by how he simplified his life making God the focal point of his existence and removing all the chaos. I am moved by his confidence that God has forgiven him and loves him dearly.

Brother says he wants to hear from the other good fellows first before we hear from the likes of Paul, Francis, Augustine or the woman on the podium in Washington D.C. "Okay," says I "that's fair enough."

Well, that was last night. Today while I am at a company meeting someone gets up and starts talking about being a caring member of the community. Another guy gets up and starts echoing the same sentiments and then proudly states that one J. L. Mullen helped the United Way of the Greater Seacoast raise over $4,000,000! Wow, I thought I was doing pretty good giving the Sisters of Mercy a check for 50 bucks.

So out of curiosity I go out to the website for the United Way in Portsmouth. Well, what do I find but feel good stories on people who have made a comeback:

• "A former heroin addict, Chris began using drugs at the age of 12. Now he works to help others with substance abuse problems."
• "One of Amy's goals is to earn a master's degree. Seven years ago, she was pregnant and homeless after leaving an abusive relationship."

Okay, Papa Bear time to fess up. I knew what you were thinking you thought wasn't really in your mind after all - think about it. You've been out selling the United Way all year and your own sales stories are the spittin' images of my woman on the podium baring her soul to the world! It's the only way we can get past our own mars and scars.

The problem with looking for the perfect person is as soon as you find him, someone else has found a picture of him with his pants around his ankles. The sinner, on the other hand, will bring out his own photo and give you hints on how to stay out of the shot. Either way there is a picture that exposes the imperfections in us all.

I'm still looking for yours, Josepe....nice work on the $4,000,000 and you really aren't a moron. Some folks might even think you a pretty good role model. Not me of course!

I'm Taking One Step at a Time

Fly to Florida and back. Fly to Chicago and back. Take the train to NYC and back. Drive to NH and back. The days get lost in one another. Somewhere someone said something interesting that I was supposed to remember. I remember making a mental note on how to recall these comments, but I can't remember the mental note. Was it "Rosebud"?

Sometimes You Just Need a Ride

You'd like to be steadfast in your approach to life and keep moving forward. But sometimes things just get too big and you have to look for a helping hand.

Don't be prideful; people who love you want to help. "There for the grace of God go I"...words that always come to mind for the compassionate person. We are here for one another.

55 Toot Salute!

We had a real fun birthday party at Mimi's today for sister Pat. Julie cooked up a delicious bread pudding dish for brunch and Geoff baked a scrumptious chocolate cake. Lots of pictures are posted on my website so click on the title above to have a look!

He Sure Looks Friendly

We watched the movie "Grizzly Man" last night and it brought back memories of our own venture into the Katmai Preserve in Alaska. In July of 2002, Julie and I took a trip with the legendary bear expert Chris Day to see the Alaskan Brown Bear upclose. Upclose as in 50 yards in front of us!

Chris herself was the leading lady of the Imax movie "Bear". The movie portrays the grizzlies as both majestic and misunderstood with some incredible footage of her and a mother with 2 cubs. Watching it you get the feeling that she has a kinship with the bears that will keep you safe when you journey with her into the wilds. The upbeat soundtrack performed by Lyle Lovett makes this a real 'feel good' movie.

Timothy Treadwell is the star of "Grizzly Man". He too thought he had a special kinship with the bears, but now he is dead. He was eaten by an aggressive bear while camping amidst the bears with his girlfriend. His girlfriend is dead also. This is a disturbing movie.

"Grizzly Man" is a provocative film worth watching. The footage he captured is stunning and in a way the story is more realistic than the picture painted in "Bear". Timothy Treadwell is an interesting if not sad character; Julie had no doubt he suffered from manic depression.

Up until watching "Grizzly Man" my own retrospective view of our bear viewing trip was one of thrills and adventure. I had never thought of it as dangerous, but now I don't know. I'd do it again given the chance, but my awareness of the perils would certainly be heightened. And I'd say a prayer for Timothy Treadwell.

I've posted the pictures I took of the bears in Alaska on Moon Mullen Photography. Click on the title of this post to go to the gallery.

Lost My Erection

There are lots of books in the marketplace explaining the differences between men and women. You know the ones about each of us being from a different planet or how to make peace with each other ...all that stuff. Well an event happened to me the other day that I know both sexes can relate to and while daydreaming on a train it struck me that it also was the perfect opportunity to explain to women what it feels like to lose your erection.

Think of the build up around an early morning trip. The night before you check the flight schedule to make sure takeoff is really at 6:00 a.m. and you start subtracting the hour for check-in, the 45 minute drive to the airport, 15 minutes to park the car and 8 hours of sleep only to realize you're already off schedule by 2 hours. Too hyped up by the anticipation of having to wake at 4:00 a.m. you can't get to sleep. The adrenaline is building.

Despite knowing you are on a tight schedule when the alarm rudely goes off at 4:00 a.m. you hit the snooze button. 15 minutes later you jump out of bed like a fireman responding to a four alarm call.

The shower slows you down a bit because it is a cold morning and the hot water feels so good.

"There won't be anyone on the roads," you think to yourself. Brush the teeth, shave, take your vitamin and put on the deodorant.

"Damn, is it really 4:55 already? Where the hell are my socks? I put them right here last night. I gotta go!"

The car windows are iced over (overlooked this in the planning) so you scrape a square large enough to give you vision to oncoming traffic. You hope the rear defroster melts what is behind you in a hurry. You skip the side windows altogether and just take your chances.

The clock in the car is 10 minutes fast, so your heart starts pounding thinking about how you are going to explain to the boss you missed the appointment. When the guy on the radio says he'll have the news at the top of the hour you breathe a sigh of relief remembering how you set the clock forward to trick yourself. There is a moment of embarrassment realizing you are so stupid that you can trick yourself!

No cars on the road. This is good. Every traffic light is red. This is bad. More build up.

Construction ahead - left lane closed. Only 10 cars on the road all trying to shoehorn through the one lane. Slight delay. More anxiety.

No cops out so you push it to 80 m.p.h. to make up for the lost minutes and straight ahead is the airport exit and you are just behind schedule. Feeling dangerous. Feeling good.

Get off at the parking lot ramp but suddenly you are faced with the long term v. short term fork in the road. Early morning brain confused between efficiency and your company expense sheet.

"It cost how much for parking?" says a little voice from accounting.

Welcome to Bradley International Long Term Parking, Floors 1,2 and 4 are full. Accelerate back up to 80 m.p.h. and hope no one steps out from their car. Get to floor 3 and you can see 2 empty spaces right next to the elevator - handicap only. Skip the remaining floors and just drive straight to the rooftop! So much for coming home to a snow free car.

Sprint to the elevator picking up a nice sweat along the way. Doors close and you fumble around for the cell phone to check the time (like a moron I stopped wearing a watch years ago in an act of defiance). 5:20 a.m.

"How bad could the security lines be at 5:30 a.m.?" you mumble out loud.

Walk directly to the e-ticket kiosk and get a boarding pass - no luggage to check - good. Dare I try to change seats to see if an exit row is available? No, just keep going. Forgot to check on the gate. Sweaty palms and feet noticeable.

Fast walk to departing gates, turn the corner and come upon security build up. All the "7 habits of highly effective" people are there at least an hour ahead of boarding and they are happy and chatty. The rest of us deadbeats smell like we just played a game of half-court basketball and are fidgeting as the ASA gestapo work in slow motion. Heart still pounding, body tensing and suspense building.

Take out the laptop, remove the change, take off the coat, remove the shoes...anything else?

"Please God, don't make me the subject of a random search this morning."

"I didn't hear anyone say, 'go' Honey, did you?" cracks inspector Shantelle. "Okay now, next!"

Go through clean and hop on one foot over to a chair to put my shoes back on. Heavy breathing.

"What is my gate number?"

Take a quick detour to look up at the departing flights board to find my gate.

"Where am I going - Orlando or Tampa? Delta..it must be Orlando."

Adrenaline at its peak....glance at the board and ....CANCELLED.

Body convulses for a brief moment in shock and all of my energy then ceases to exist. All that work and emotion for nothing. There will be no takeoff or landing today.

That's the same feeling you get when you lose an erection. So, if you are a woman who has had this travel experience you have also had the experience of losing an erection. We really aren't that different after all.

Let me know if this description of how a man sees the world was helpful to the women subscribers. Conversely, if I just widened the gap recommend a title from Ophrah's Book Club that might help me out.

Ave Maria

I got an interesting email today from a production company in Burbank, CA looking to use one of my Catholic photos. The National Geographic Channel is going to be doing a 3 part special on the Secret History of Religion later this year and they needed a photo of a Virgin Mary Procession. They did an internet search and came up with my image. The net is unbelievable!

Last month Scout.com asked for permission to use some photos of a Connecticut HS football player I featured in the Four County Catholic newspaper. Scout.com publishes college specific sports recruiting magazines and specialty websites.

Hold on to your hats sports fans. I might be getting famous. Do you think I should get some business cards?

My Dad's Email Address?

James traveled north to Vermont last weekend to ski with his friends and spend some time at Buck's Palace in Burlington. Little did he know Buck would betray him with a digital pic!

In Scooter's defense, the only thing in Buck's fridge is beer and chocolate milk. The chocolate milk gets old after awhile.

Check out the Hawaiian Green Bay Packers shirt. Buck has a closet of more than 20 Hawaiian shirts, but who could know the Packers have a fan club in Waikiki.

If you can't get a ticket to the NFL playoffs the next best place for a seat is on Prospect Avenue in Burlington. 26 speakers and a professional movie screen to show off his overhead projector make the game more realistic than the real game. Go Patriots...wait...go Packers or the Raiders...who the heck is in the finals? When you're at the Bucksters it really doesn't matter.

Amorillas - Celebrating Christmas

I thought you would enjoy this beauty!

Cheryl planted this bulb in the window of the TV room.

It was potted in October and bloomed at Christmas.

Simple beauty of nature.Joe

But Honey, I Have to Go!

Julie told me a couple of weeks ago not to plan anything for Saturday because she had to go to Erin's bridal shower. It seems Cheryl called Julie to say they were planning a surprise party at the Bergeron's in Wellesley and it would really mean a lot to Erin if the girls from Connecticut attended. It sounded to me like an obligatory event.

When we woke up this morning I was feeling a little tinge of envy having been away the better part of the week. But I figured if Julie can make the sacrifice to go to the party, I could put aside my selfish feelings. After all, if I knew Julie was putting on the stiff upper lip how would I be able to spend the day moping around?

You don't think I got duped, do you?

Hey, Old Man Winter! Is That All You Got?

It was 56 degrees and sunny in Hartford today! Mid-January, no snow in sight and none in the forecast for the next 10 days. Thank God we didn't get all nostalgic about the skating rink and flood the yard.

We did have snow for Christmas and a pretty big storm shortly thereafter. The strategy of waiting it out a couple of weeks before shoveling worked. The driveway is clear now!

The photo is a scene from last winter in case you missed it.

Kellogg Rocks the Cereal World

Most of life changes fast. Sometimes so fast that you can't appreciate the change. Just look at how quickly your computer becomes yesterday's model.

Cereal on the other hand evolves slowly over time so when it does change you take notice. As a kid you ate shredded wheat by crushing a brick of it in a bowl and sprinkling sugar on top. A decade later you could buy shredded wheat in a frosted mini-mode making it more efficient to eat the same bowl of cereal.

Now thirty years later 2 new flavors of mini-shredded wheats are available - maple & brown sugar and vanilla cream. Do yourself a favor and have a bowl of each with a splash of ice cold whole milk! You'll be asking yourself what have the cereal engineers been doing all these years? You'll be asking yourself if it's okay to eat cereal for dinner?

Disclaimer: I don't own any Kellogg stock.

Blow out the Candles

Christmas has come to a close for another year. The Feast of the Epiphany was celebrated today and we sung our last Christmas carol at the close of Mass. I have come to enjoy and appreciate the Church calendar as a way of helping me focus on what is truly important in my life.

If I followed the department store calendar Christmas would begin on November 1st and end on December 26th. Both dates come too early.

Thankfully the Magi had to travel great distances to find the baby Jesus which takes a little time; you just can't rush a camel! The two weeks of quite celebration and wonderment at the modest birth of the Christchild give me just enough pause to understand the meaning of Christmas.

Sometimes I worry about people destroying Christmas with too much emphasis on the secular traditions. All those politically correct arguments about Christmas v. The Holidays can wear you out and take away from the joy of the season. But as I reflect today on the close of the Christmas Season, I realize that those who proffer the argument are silent today as they are on a different calendar. Christmas is safe and sound for yet another year.

"And behold, the star that they had seen at its rising preceded them, until it came and stopped over the place where the child was. They were overjoyed at seeing the star, and on entering the house they saw the child with Mary his mother. They prostrated themselves and did him homage." Matthew 2:9-11

I Hope I Saved That Report

curiosity
noun

1. A desire to know or learn.
2. A desire to know about people or things that do not concern one; nosiness.
3. An object that arouses interest, as by being novel or extraordinary.

Have you ever seen the Tibetan monks create a mandela out of painted sand? It is a fascinating exercise in patience and humility as they create a masterful piece of art only to demolish it shortly thereafter.

Well, putting together a business proposal isn't quite like diagramming the origins of the universe, but with one click of the mouse it can be destroyed. What rage, say I!

"Papa Moon, Buddha taught that much of your burden and joylessness is from your craving for what you can't have and your clinging to what you can't keep. Reach for the enlightenment, Pappa Moon, and let it go."

After a few anxious moments and quite a bit of panic I did find enlightenment hidden in the origins of my computer operating system. The proposal was intact with the exception of the last paragraph in the "Temporary File" folder.

A humble thank you to the binary gods, say I.

What's in a Name?

People have been calling me Moon for more than 38 years and asking me why I'm called Moon for just as long. Most people think it has something to do with flashing my fanny which just proves how depraved most folks are. The truth is I had my nickname way before I ever hung my rear end out the back window of Buck's Chevy Impala.

Well, today a judge in Maryland ruled mooning is not illegal and so naturally the question of my nickname came up once more. Here is the truth:

When I was in 5th grade I showed up at a football practice for the South End Steelers hoping to join the team. You were supposed to be in the 6th grade to play, but I just kept my mouth shut and walked onto the field anyway.

The 8th graders were running the offense and the rest of us were supposed to simulate a defensive squad they could stomp on for the afternoon. On the first play from scrimmage they ran a power sweep left to my side of the field. The running back broke past all the other defenders and I threw my body at him to make the stop. I got trampled!

My helmet was twisted sideways and I couldn't feel my legs, but I did make the tackle. Seeing I was about to cry and wanting to keep me from quitting the coach pulled me up and yelled out, "Who is this kid?"

Mike Van Sleet yelled back, "That's Moon Mullen!" The name stuck ever since. It helped out that Mike was the toughest guy on the Steelers and everyone followed his cue.

Back in the day, and way before mine, Moon Mullins was part of the Gasoline Alley comic strip. He was a toughie of sorts so the name seemed appropriate for the moment. It's a fun name to have and one that most folks never forget, but it was the last tackle I ever made!

New Year's Resolution - Blow More Bubbles

I made a list of things I should improve in my life including losing weight, exercising more (some), spending less, saving more (some), praying daily, exhibiting kindness, making fewer misteaks, and being less sarcastic (yeah, right!). One day after making the list I failed on 7 of my 8 goals.

So, I am exercising the right to change my mind and proclaim a new resolution - blow more bubbles! I'll still give the other items a try, but a review of the tapes from years past doesn't bode well for success.

I'm going for the happiness factor in 2006. If you see me deviating from this goal be a friend and whisper, "Moon, go blow some bubbles!"

Goodbye 2005!

I've been watching a lot of TV the last 3 days and everyone is showing their 2005 Top 10 highlights. I don't know where I have been all year but there is a lot more going on than just Hurricane Katrina, Iraq and Paris Hilton.

Did you know the Cooking Channel did not name a single souffle to the 2005 Top 10 Recipes? How about the stunning announcement from the Outdoor Life Network that in 2006 the Bassmaster Tour would be split between a Southern and Northern division?

Anyhow, it got me to thinking about my own highlight real for 2005. My life isn't exciting enough to warrant 10 events but these 5 stand out for me:

5. $3,458 IRS direct deposit refund for the tax year 2004. Thank you Turbo Tax!

4. Refinanced the house with a 30 year adjustable rate mortgage. The Fed announced 8 rate increases in 2005!

3. Received official notice from the IRS I owe $1,790 for the tax year 2003. What the hell, Turbo Tax!

2. Made my last payment on the 2000 Nissan Maxima and drove "car payment" free for 11 months! It's sputters a little bit, but I'm holding on as long as I can.

1. Went to Confession just before Christmas. "Bless me Father for I have sinned. It's been...let's see 2005 minus 1978 equals...28...no...27 years since my last Confession. Is there a time limit, Father?"